Adult Children of Alcoholics, Addicts, & Dysfunctional Families
Trait #8: "We became addicted to excitement"
"Either way, excitement or fear, adult children use both to mimic the feeling of being alive when in reality they are recreating a scene from their family of origin. Gossip, dramatic scenes, pending financial failure, or failing health are often the turmoil that adult children create in their lives to feel connected to reality. While such behavior is rarely stated as such, these behaviors are an "addiction" to excitement or fear.
Because we were raised in chaotic or controlling homes, our internal compass is oriented toward excitement, pain, and shame. This inner world can be described as an "inside drug store". The shelves are stocked with bottles of excitement, toxic shame, self-hate, self-doubt, and stress...As odd as it sounds, we can seek out situations so we can experience a "hit" of one of these inner drugs. We can create chaos to feel excitement. Or, we procrastinate on the job to feel stress. Before ACA, we picked relationships that triggered our childhood unrest because it felt normal to be upset, persecuted, or shamed. During these moments, we thought we felt alive with excitement, but in reality, we were staying just ahead of our aching childhood. Our actions as adults represent our addiction to excitement and a variety of inner drugs created to survive childhood. Many of our repressed feelings have actually been changed into inner drugs that drive us to harm ourselves or others...Without ACA, we can view emotionally healthy people as boring or confusing."
- ACA Big Red Book, pgs.15-16
Do you relate to some of this? As a therapist specializing in Adult Children of Alcoholics, Addicts, & Dysfunctional families, we will work together to discover the roots of maladaptive coping patterns, trauma, and shame. Help, hope, and healing are possible! I'm a licensed clinician providing 100% telehealth in the states of Missouri, Florida, & South Carolina. I'd love to hear from you!
Text or call today to setup your 10-15 minute complimentary consultation call: 561-501-1996.
I'm cheering for you!