| Dysfunctional Relationships |

EMDR Intensive Therapy for ACOAs | Florida, Missouri & South Carolina

​Adult children of alcoholics, addicts, or dysfunctional families often find themselves in unhealthy, toxic relationships continuously; it also feels like a mystery. Like, why does this keep happening?

In her book, “Adult Children of Alcoholics”, Janet Geringer Woititz suggests that you ask these specific questions when you find yourself in a dysfunctional or toxic relationship (be it with family, friends, co-workers, etc)

• What is in this for me?
• What is the payoff?
• Why do I maintain this relationship?
• Who is this other person to me?

I’d like to add another question to this list, “What am I afraid will happen if I assert myself and express my needs?” This can reveal a lot about our internal battle/struggle and give us a richer perspective on what fears/insecurities we may be up against and need to work through.

Janet explains it like this in her book, "The answers to these questions are often quite surprising. You may find that a person represents someone else in your life. Your lover may be very much like your alcoholic (or dysfunctional) parent was when you were growing up. You may be repeating a pattern because it is familiar. You may not have broken early ties and may be setting yourself up again." [Excerpt from the book Adult Children of Alcoholics by Janet Geringer Woititz]

I highly recommend this book if you grew up in any type of dysfunctional household. It doesn't just apply for children who grew up with alcoholics or addicts. Any dysfunction produces the same/similar character traits for the children. 

If you’re ready to begin exploring how the past may be impacting your present, I’d love to join you on your journey of healing. I’m cheering for you!

- Brittni
561.501.1996
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